Your Job Title Doesn’t Matter. Who You’re Becoming Does.

You need to figure out what you want out of work, other than a paycheck.

For many, work is a central part of their identity. It’s ingrained in our culture. When you meet someone new, your job title is often the first thing you share. This feels normal—after all, it’s a social norm in much of the Western world.

But this is dangerous.

Your job isn’t meant to be your entire personality—at least not if you’re striving for an interesting and meaningful life.

There are many aspects of life that make up who you are:

your hobbies and interests
your strengths
your relationships
contributions you make outside of work
your daily habits and routines

When your relationship with work is healthy, these aspects of your personality combine with what you do for work to help form part of your identity. However, many people (including my past self!) allow work to overpower the other aspects of their identity. When this happens, work takes on too much of a role in their life. While that may work in the short-term, it isn’t sustainable. It’s not only a recipe for burnout, it’s also the path to a very one-dimensional life. You will not be a very interesting person if the only thing going on in your life is your work.

There’s another danger; what if something goes wrong at work? If too much of your identity is tied up in what you do for a living, who would you be if you were suddenly laid off? Or passed over for a promotion you had your heart set on?

You’re not resilient if your entire sense of self is tied to your role at work. We know that diversification is key to managing risk—so why should your identity be any different? A resilient person is someone who can weather setbacks, not just in their career but in their personal life, too. Putting all your eggs in the “work basket” is risky.

Ask Yourself Some Tough Questions

Completely separating your identity from your work isn’t possible, and may not even be desirable. After all, you likely spend a significant portion of your life at work, so it is okay for it to play a role in your definition of who you are. But you need to ensure that your sense of self isn’t completely dependent on your work. Start by asking yourself some questions:

What do I most like about myself, outside of what I do for work?
What am I most proud of?
If I lost my job tomorrow, how would I introduce myself to a stranger?
What impact do I want to have on the world, outside of work?
How do my friends and family describe me when not talking about work?
What interests would I pursue if money or societal expectations weren’t a factor?
What activities outside of work energize me, and how well do I prioritize them?
How do I measure success in life?

If the answers to these questions leave you uneasy, it’s time to broaden your sense of self. Don’t let your job consume your identity. The larger your life outside of work is, the healthier your relationship with work will be. And the counter-intuitive benefit is that you’ll likely be more effective at work. When you’re constantly stressed, anxious, and unhappy because you’re pushing so hard at work, you cannot be effective.

Don’t Burn Yourself Out

Letting work define too much of who you are puts you on a fast track to burnout. I’ve been there, and trust me—burning out for work isn’t worth it. But don’t get me wrong: work can and should play a meaningful role in your life. The key is ensuring it fuels your personal growth, not consumes it.

Your career should align with who you want to become. If your job isn’t helping you move toward that person, it might be time to craft your role to better support your life goals. After all, your work should give you more than just a paycheck.

Actionable Takeaway

Start by rewriting the story you tell yourself about who you are—without relying on your job title. Explore your identity outside of work, and challenge the labels you’ve placed on yourself. You’re the author of your life, so make your story as rich and interesting as possible.

Your life is about more than just work. Make sure your work fuels the life you want—not the other way around. Challenge yourself this week: take one small step toward building a richer identity outside of work. Whether it’s diving into a hobby, nurturing a relationship, or reflecting on your values, these are the kinds of steps, when taken consistently, that lead to a more balanced, fulfilling, and interesting life.

Quotation that I’ve been pondering

I came across an interesting excerpt from a poem called The Indispensable Man, written by Saxon White Kessinger.

“Take a bucket and fill it with water,

Put your hand in it up to the wrist,

Pull it out and the hole that’s remaining,

Is a measure of how much you’ll be missed.

You can splash all you wish when you enter,

You may stir up the water galore,

But stop, and you’ll find that in no time,

It looks quite the same as before.”

It’s such a great reminder that while we may feel like our work matters, in the grand scheme of things, we’re not much more than some splashes on the surface on this glorious ride called life.

Journal prompt

“Who could I dare to let myself be if I wasn’t afraid of being judged?”

Call to Adventure

Feeling ready to shake up your career and start aligning your work with what really matters to you? I’m here to help. In a 60-minute career strategy call, we’ll uncover what you truly want from your professional life and create a clear, actionable roadmap to get you there. Whether you’re looking for more balance, reigniting your passion, or taking that bold next step, I’ve got you covered.

Whenever you’re ready, let’s craft the next chapter of your career together—one that works for you and fuels the life you want.

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