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Weāre now in the thick of the holiday season. Neighbourhoods are lit up with festive lights, trees are glowing inside peopleās living rooms, and the malls are full of people scurrying about. While some find the holiday season stressful, I rather enjoy it.
I always set aside time for myself during this time of year, reflecting on the year that passed. I ponder how Iāve changed, how much progress Iāve made (or not made!) towards my goals, and whether life feels āon trackā for me.
While I can do this at any point in the year, I find myself drawn to doing it just before the transition into a new year. Over this past week, I took a full day āmini-sabbaticalā, where I spent the day doing nothing but reflecting on the year, envisioning my long-term future, and setting my goals for 2024. I went into full-on “monk mode” for this exercise.
It was my appreciation for this quiet time to myself that inspired this weekās theme for the newsletter.
Note – this will be the last newsletter issue in 2023, as I gear up to enjoy time with friends and family.
I hope you have a fantastic holiday, that you spend time with loved ones, and that you feel grateful for the incredible life you get to live.
I look forward to the upcoming year with a tremendous amount of optimism, despite the challenges the world faces. Remember that there will always be challenges, and that they always present incredible opportunities for those who will remain positive and lean into them.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
Tim
The Ultimate Gift To Yourself: Clarity Amongst The Holiday Chaos
We are getting into the thick of the holiday season, our days filling up even more quickly than usual with tasks and errands. There are so many people to see, events to be planned, and glasses to be raised in cheer.
This is a time traditionally marked by a whirlwind of activities – family gatherings, holiday preparations, and the rush to wrap up both work commitments and gifts.
But amongst the chaos of the flurry of activities, I invite you to stop. Go inside yourself. Allow yourself quiet time for reflection and inspiration. It feels like a guilty luxury, like you shouldnāt have permission to treat yourself to having time to do that during this busy season. But just try it. Youāll find that slowing down, allowing your mind to settle, and taking time to reflect is one of the most productive things you can do.
By going inside yourself, youāll stop the noise, so that you can get clarity about what you really want. Not what your intellect tells you that you want, but something deeper.
Why Reflect During the Holidays?
The holiday season, often bustling with activities, can paradoxically be the best time for deep reflection. Itās a period that naturally lends itself to looking back on the year that was and preparing for the year that will be. Itās a pause, a breath between the chapters of our lives.
According to the concept of ātemporal landmarksā in psychology, certain dates (like the beginning of a new year) serve as psychological markers that separate different phases of our lives. These landmarks encourage us to reflect on past behaviours and set goals for the future. They create a mental āfresh startā effect, which can motivate people to pursue goals or changes that they have been putting off.
Our perception of time is cyclical (days, weeks, months, years), and these cycles encourage us to think in terms of beginnings and endings. The new year represents a significant cyclical event, making it a natural point for initiating changes.
Reflection isnāt merely about reminiscing or planning. Itās a powerful tool for personal transformation, a vehicle for communicating with your soul. It is an opportunity to connect with who you really are and who you really want to become.
Benefits of Reflection
- Clarity: Reducing the noise and stopping to think helps you get more clear on what you want. It offers you the chance to realize how far youāve come, and how much youāve grown. It also provides the opportunity for you to bring the lessons youāve learned along the way into your consciousness so you can fully integrate them.
- Goal Setting: By understanding your past year, you can set more meaningful and achievable goals for the next year. You gain a better sense of what worked for you and what obstacles you encountered. Noting these obstacles allows you to take proactive actions that will increase your likelihood of success in the upcoming year.
- Mindset Shift: It allows you to transition from a state of constant doing to a state of being. Youāll enjoy the holiday season more, as this will help shift you into a state of gratitude for what you have. By investing time in yourself, youāre proving to yourself that you are someone that takes achieving your goals seriously. This will reinforce your identity as someone that gets results, and will lead to a renewed sense of optimism.
- Stress Reduction: Taking time to reflect can significantly reduce stress, as it allows you to process your experiences and emotions. Reducing your stress during this season is important, as many of us struggle with the challenges of family drama and conflict that inevitably seem to arise during the holidays.
How to Reflect Effectively
- Find Quiet Time: Carve out moments of solitude amidst the holiday cheer. Whether itās a peaceful morning walk or a quiet evening by the fireplace, find a space that allows you to think without distractions.
- Journal Your Thoughts: Writing helps clarify thinking. In fact, writing IS thinking, in a more organized form, as it forces you to structure and organize your thoughts. This helps provide additional clarity, and also a tangible record of your reflections.
- Ask Guiding Questions: Reflect on questions like āWhat were my biggest successes and why?ā, āWhat challenges did I overcome and how?ā, and āWhat have I learned about myself?ā The higher the quality of questions you ask yourself, the more insight youāll gain from your time spent in reflection.
- Envision the Future: Imagine where you want to be this time next year. What steps do you need to take to get there?
This holiday season, gift yourself the time for reflection and introspection.
It might just be the most valuable gift you receive.
Wishing you a reflective and rejuvenating holiday season!
Quotation that I have been pondering
It would be difficult to come up with a better quote that speaks of introspection is than this beauty from Carl Jung;
āWho looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.ā
I interpret the awakening that Jung refers to as a metaphor for becoming fully conscious and self-aware. It suggests transitioning from a state of unawareness and following societal norms and expectations to an enlightened state of understanding of oneās true self, desires, and potential.
In summary, Jungās quote encapsulates his view that true understanding, growth, and transformation come from an introspective journey into the self, rather than focusing on the external world. This process of turning inward is what he sees as the path to awakening – a state of heightened awareness and understanding of oneself.
Journal Prompt
Many of us, myself included, are way too hard on ourselves. We set ambitious goals and high expectations and then beat ourselves up if we fall short of them. That isnāt healthy.
Instead, āmeasure the gain instead of the gap.ā That means that rather than reflecting on how you fell short of your expectations of yourself, reflect on how much youāve grown and how much progress youāve made.
āHow have I changed over the past year? What is most surprising to me about those changes? How do I want to change over the next year?ā
If youāre still the same person you were last year, youāve squandered your precious time. While itās true that time passes so quickly, a year is more than enough time that when you look back at how youāve changed over it, you should find yourself surprised.
If youāre going to change, be intentional about it. Set aside time to ponder the above questions and mull over them. Then use what you discover to help you set your goals for the year. Youāll thank yourself in 2025 when you look back at how much youāve grown.
