I got everything I thought I wanted, and it almost broke me.
Years ago, I was chasing a promotion. I was sure I wanted it.
It looked great on paper; more responsibility, the opportunity to have even more influence, a fancy title that sounded cool, and, of course, more money. The classic next step. What everyone wants, right?
I got the promotion.
I was so proud of myself, feeling like “I’d arrived”.
Now things would be great!
Finally!
But the shine quickly wore off when I needed to do the work. Instead of feeling like I’d won, it felt like a loss.
I lost time. Energy. Sleep. Connection. Creativity.
The work I loved doing got buried beneath the weight of the trappings in what I thought success was supposed to look like.
Here’s what I realized too late:
I made a career decision in isolation.
I didn’t stop to ask how it would affect the rest of my life.
Because we don’t live in silos.
There’s a tool I sometimes use with clients called the Wheel of Life. Imagine a circle divided into slices—each slice representing a major domain of your life:
- Career & Work
- Health (physical, mental, spiritual)
- Finances
- Love & Partnership (spouse, dating life)
- Family & Friends
- Personal Growth
- Fun & Recreation
- Contribution / Purpose
Here’s a visual to make this clear:
In a balanced life, each of those areas is getting at least some attention. The wheel is round, and it turns smoothly.
But what happens if you crank one slice way up (like your career) and the others stay small?
You don’t get a high-performance machine.
You get a busted-ass wheel.
Try rolling forward on that, and you’ll feel it in your bones. Literally. Your body will break down. Your joy will vanish. Your relationships will strain.
That’s what happened to me.
And it’s what happens to a lot of smart, high-performing people who get trapped chasing a bigger pay cheque or a fancier title, without first considering whether the life that comes with it is one they actually want.
Here’s the truth:
You can do almost anything. But you can’t do everything.
Every “yes” is a trade-off, a “no” to something else. And if you’re not choosing your trade-offs consciously, you’re choosing them by default.
So before you say yes to more…
Pause.
Zoom out.
Look at the wheel.
Ask yourself:
If I go hard in this one area… what’s going to get flattened?
Something to chew on this week:
What part of your life wheel is wobbling right now, and what would it take to re-balance it?
Quotation I’ve Been Pondering
“Your problem is not the problem. Your problem is your attitude about the problem.” — Captain Jack Sparrow, from Pirates of the Caribbean
Journal Prompt
“What are the top 3 things I most desire in each domain of my Wheel of Life? And what’s one small action I could take this week to move toward them?”
Until next week!!
Work and live well.
Tim
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