The Art Of The Level Up: Unlearning Who You Are

You don’t need to learn more to be successful. Instead, you need to unlearn the things that are holding you back.

As someone who deeply values continuous learning, this statement challenges my thinking. I’m always seeking new knowledge to deepen my understanding. However, sometimes you’ll find success by removing obstacles blocking your advancement.

In a rapidly changing world, continuous learning is a necessity. To navigate today’s choppy waters, we need to adapt and grow constantly. Often, we focus on acquiring new knowledge and skills, but we must also discard what no longer serves us. This is the concept of unlearning.

Unlearning is about letting go of habits, mindsets, and perceptions that prevent you from achieving your full potential. It’s about breaking free from limiting beliefs, unproductive habits, and the urge to conform to external expectations. Just as a caterpillar sheds its skin to become a butterfly, you too need to shed old parts of yourself to transform into something greater.

The patterns of thinking you’ve developed over time have served you well. That’s why they became patterns; you found them useful. They helped you get to where you are. But now, they are also holding you where you are, anchoring you in place. You’ve got to set them aside if you’re going to permit yourself to level up.

Unlearning is challenging, requiring you to question your assumptions, challenge the status quo, and face the discomfort of stepping outside your comfort zones. You’re asked to let go of the very things that have made you successful, and even to abandon your idea of who you once were, to make space for who you could become.

To live a radically different life, you need to become a radically different person. That is scary as hell.

So, how do you unlearn?

Start by identifying the beliefs and behaviours that are holding you back. Challenge them. Observe yourself throughout the day, noting how you feel, what you think, and what you believe to be true. Then, ask yourself:

“Is this belief serving me?”
“Is this habit bringing me closer to my goals?”
“Am I doing this because I want to or because I feel I should?”

When you find a habit or way of thinking that isn’t moving you toward your goals, decide to let go of it. Allow that piece of yourself to die, making way for a new way of being. You can honour the previous you, knowing that your past well served you, but acknowledging that getting to where you want to go requires you to become someone different.

Unlearning doesn’t mean forgetting or discarding everything; that could ensure you’re not learning from your past experiences and slowing your growth. Instead, it means selectively letting go of knowledge and behaviours that may have served you before, but are now holding you back and replacing them with ones that empower you to embark on your next phase of life.

It’s about making space for the new by clearing out the old.

In this journey of unlearning, be patient and kind to yourself. It’s not an overnight process, but a never-ending journey of transformation.

Don’t allow yourself to be trapped in an old identity, even if it feels as comfortable as your favourite pair of jeans. If you want to soar, you’ll need to let go of the parts of yourself that are weighing you down.

Quotation that I’ve been pondering

Confucius, on how we acquire wisdom:

“By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest.”

It’s an interesting quote, although if I’m honest, I think we actually need to employ all three of these methods to truly acquire wisdom. While you can gain ground by thinking about a problem, you’re not able to properly test your ideas in the real world. Imitating others is a great beginner tactic, as success does leave clues. But the only true way to gain wisdom is through actual experience. I really think the optimal approach is to use all three methods.

Journal prompt

“When I think about my future, how do I feel? And does that feeling serve me or hold me back? Might it be worth reframing how I think about my future?”